So what do you do when the object of your desire is a gay man who is “in the closet” about his sexuality? Are these dating relationships viable? Generally speaking, the prognosis for relationship success tends to be stronger when gay men are of similar “outness” statuses. There tends to be less tension and friction due to the mutual positions they hold with sexual identity comfort. For example, in situations when one man is “out” and the other is “closeted”, the more “out” man often times feels like he has to slip back into the closet to accommodate his partner and this can feel like he’s going backwards in his personal development and can lead to resentment. The more closeted man can often times feel pressured to be more visible and exposed before he’s emotionally ready to handle those situations and can cause a spike in anxiety, and perhaps even withdrawal and disengagement from the relationship.

Click on the following link to read the rest:  http://www.datingadvice.com/advice/are-you-dating-the-closeted-hottie

© Dr. Brian Rzepczynski, The Gay Love Coach

www.thegaylovecoach.com

This particular article is not for re-publication in other e-zines, magazines, or websites as DatingAdvice.com owns the rights to this material in partnership. Any questions or consent to do so is required by that organization.

Dear Dr. Brian:

I’m a very quiet guy when alone. All my friends say when people first meet me, people feel like I’m about to beat them/kill them. They say it’s the way my eyes are, but I don’t know how that makes guys so afraid of me.

I’m not bad looking, bit overweight, not particularly tall (just 5 feet 9 inches), so I don’t why this seems to drive men away in fear.

How do I stop being creepy?

-Jay

Click on the following link to read the response:  http://www.datingadvice.com/q-and-a/im-a-quiet-guy-how-do-i-stop-seeming-creepy

Dear Dr. Brian:

I have borderline Asperger syndrome, anxiety/panic/depression that is controlled by meds and PTSD.

The Asperger’s forces me to disclose everything whether its appropriate or not. I’m a hopeless romantic with all of this baggage. I usually torpedo things by the third date.

Is there any hope for me?

-Frank (Rhode Island)

Click on the following link to read the response: http://www.datingadvice.com/q-and-a/im-a-hopeless-romantic-with-baggage-is-there-any-hope-for-me

While our gay community is enjoying some well deserved heightened acceptance of our identities and relationships in society nowadays, the process of coming out as a gay man to ourselves and others can still be a difficult and painful journey. Coming to terms with our sexuality means facing the fact that we’re different from the norm and confronting fears about losing relationships with family and friends if they choose not to support us. It’s a form of grieving process that also involves working through feelings of shame, guilt, and fear as we work to combat internalized homophobia. But the benefits are great for those who dare, for living a life of authenticity parallels no other. To be “out” means to be free, spontaneous, uninhibited, and unafraid of judgment.

Click on the following link to read the rest:  http://www.datingadvice.com/advice/should-i-stay-or-should-i-go

© Dr. Brian Rzepczynski, The Gay Love Coach

www.thegaylovecoach.com

This particular article is not for re-publication in other e-zines, magazines, or websites as DatingAdvice.com owns the rights to this material in partnership. Any questions or consent to do so is required by that organization.

I’ve been getting a lot of letters lately from gay men interested in dating guys either much older or much younger than themselves and questioning whether these “May/December” relationships really work out in the long run. I personally don’t believe age gaps in relationships are as stigmatizing or concerning in the gay community; perhaps this has to do with the smaller pooler of dating prospects available, tendencies toward more open-mindedness and liberal attitudes, and already being more conditioned and accepting of diversity. But in short…yes, they can work! But these relationship pairings can pose some unique challenges that will require extra diligence and commitment to communication and compromise. And with most relationship dynamics, there are many rewards and difficulties inherent in these dating couplings.

Click on the following link to read the rest:  http://www.datingadvice.com/advice/do-may-to-december-relationships-work

© Dr. Brian Rzepczynski, The Gay Love Coach

www.thegaylovecoach.com

This particular article is not for re-publication in other e-zines, magazines, or websites as DatingAdvice.com owns the rights to this material in partnership. Any questions or consent to do so is required by that organization.

It seems gay parenting is on the rise! Whether he has children from a prior heterosexual relationship, has gone through foster care or private adoption, or has fathered a child with a female friend or surrogate, a growing segment of the gay dating market is gay dads. As admirable and inspiring as this is, I was surprised to hear from a client recently that he finds his gay dad status to be a liability in the gay singles circuit. His experience has been that many gay men express interest initially until they discover that he has children and then they fade away into the woodwork. I’ve heard this sentiment echoed by other single dads. Why is this?

Click on the following link to read the rest:  http://www.datingadvice.com/advice/are-you-a-gay-dad-seeking-a-sexy-life-partner

© Dr. Brian Rzepczynski, The Gay Love Coach

www.thegaylovecoach.com

This particular article is not for re-publication in other e-zines, magazines, or websites as DatingAdvice.com owns the rights to this material in partnership. Any questions or consent to do so is required by that organization.

Hope for a Gay Dad?

Question: I have recently joined a dating site but I’m not sure if my profile is an eye-catcher. I was married to a woman for a number of years and I have never had sex with a man. I’m now a single dad and have gone on a couple of dates but they always end the same way. They find out I have kids and they can’t seem to get away fast enough. My children are the most important thing to me and if it means being single the rest of my life, then so be it. But I can’t believe all gay guys don’t want kids. Am I doomed to singlehood? read more >>

Opening Remarks

Gay culture highlights youth, muscle, and good looks as valuable assets and commodities when it comes to sexuality and relationships. All one has to do is turn the pages of your favorite gay newspaper or magazine (that doesn’t necessarily have to be sexual in nature) and you’ll be distracted by photographs and advertisements of attractive men with chiseled bodies oozing sex appeal to titillate the senses. Or log on to any dating or personals site on the Web and you’ll find hosts of men demanding youth and rugged masculine good-looks as personal requirements in their profiles to consider even corresponding or chatting with them. read more >>

Dear Coach:

My best friend is Caucasian and he has historically had a really hard time getting a date. He tried your coaching suggestions and it worked for him—he met a great guy and things are going quite well for them. I tried the same things that he did, but it didn’t work out the same for me. I’m still single and looking with no prospects in the near future. I’m mixed African American and Asian and am wondering if the rules are different being a person of color. What do you think?

read more >>