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Your portal for Dating, Relationship, & Sexual Enrichment Skills and Strategies

Question: Can two bottoms in a monogamous gay relationship make it work? The answer to this….a resounding yes! But this will also depend on what you put into the relationship, as well as the attitude that goes along with it. I recently wrote an article about top/top couple pairings, and you can read about this here: http://www.datingadvice.com/advice/can-there-be-two-tops-in-a-relationship

It’s quite interesting to me the increase in questions that have been coming in about the viability of top/top and bottom/bottom relationships, and it’s actually something that’s concerning to me. One of the advantages about being gay in our culture is that we don’t have to be bound by rigid, stereotyped roles. Since we don’t have a template for how our relationships “should” be structured in the way that our straight counterparts do, we have the freedom and flexibility to create and tailor our relationships according to our own wishes, preferences, and talents. What’s concerning is that we seem to be dichotomizing our relationships and sexual roles through a binary lens that not only limits our potential, but also limits the available dating pool.

Click on the following link to read the rest:  http://www.datingadvice.com/advice/bottoms-can-two-bottoms-make-relationship-work

© Dr. Brian Rzepczynski, The Gay Love Coach

www.thegaylovecoach.com

This particular article is not for re-publication in other e-zines, magazines, or websites as DatingAdvice.com owns the rights to this material in partnership. Any questions or consent to do so is required by that organization.

One of the big “question mark” situations that is quite common among singles is when their ex-boyfriend comes back into the picture. Sparks start flying again and you both begin to ponder the possibility of reconciling and starting a new relationship with each other. You feel torn because you’re feeling a renewed attraction with someone familiar and have a resurgence of fantasies of what could be, while at the same time you recognize that you broke up with him once before for a particular reason.

Click on the following link to read the rest:   http://www.datingadvice.com/advice/6-questions-to-ask-before-reconciling-with-an-ex

© Dr. Brian Rzepczynski, The Gay Love Coach

www.thegaylovecoach.com

This particular article is not for re-publication in other e-zines, magazines, or websites as DatingAdvice.com owns the rights to this material in partnership. Any questions or consent to do so is required by that organization.

 

I often get letters from guys who are in the throes of dating relationships with men of the same sexual role preference (two tops, the ones doing the penetrating during sex, and two bottoms, the ones being penetrated) and find themselves experiencing frustration and conflict when their sexual fulfillment takes a hit and their needs are unmet. This is a common scenario and can create strain in an otherwise perfectly compatible partnership when everything is aligned just right except the bedroom satisfaction element.

Click on the following link to read the rest:   http://www.datingadvice.com/advice/can-there-be-two-tops-in-a-relationship

© Dr. Brian Rzepczynski, The Gay Love Coach

www.thegaylovecoach.com

This particular article is not for re-publication in other e-zines, magazines, or websites as DatingAdvice.com owns the rights to this material in partnership. Any questions or consent to do so is required by that organization.

 

I’ve had an influx of readers and clients lately who have finally met the man of their dreams and are happily paired in a new dating relationship (after what seems like a lifetime of trying to find him), only to be disappointed and distressed when they discover the sex has gone flat and they’re struggling in the bedroom. They are thrilled to have Mr. Right in their lives, but they miss the sexual highs and adventure of their single life.

Click on the following link to read the rest:  http://www.datingadvice.com/advice/im-batman-youre-robin

© Dr. Brian Rzepczynski, The Gay Love Coach

www.thegaylovecoach.com

This particular article is not for re-publication in other e-zines, magazines, or websites as DatingAdvice.com owns the rights to this material in partnership. Any questions or consent to do so is required by that organization.

 

So let’s say you’ve been dating this great guy for a while and then things start to go south. Maybe you’ve been arguing a bit more. Or perhaps you feel a bit more distant and disconnected from each other lately. Or maybe the sex isn’t as good as it once was. One of the most excruciating dating dilemmas is having to make that difficult decision of whether to salvage a relationship or terminate it. These situations are made that much more torturous when you recognize that your partner is really a “good catch” and that you have a lot in common with mutual attraction. But yet something seems off and you’re really torn about what to do, not wanting to make a horrible mistake that you’ll regret for the rest of the your life.

Click on the following link to read the rest:  http://www.datingadvice.com/advice/should-i-stay-or-should-i-go

© Dr. Brian Rzepczynski, The Gay Love Coach

www.thegaylovecoach.com

This particular article is not for re-publication in other e-zines, magazines, or websites as DatingAdvice.com owns the rights to this material in partnership. Any questions or consent to do so is required by that organization.

 

I’ve been getting a lot of letters lately from gay men interested in dating guys either much older or much younger than themselves and questioning whether these “May/December” relationships really work out in the long run. I personally don’t believe age gaps in relationships are as stigmatizing or concerning in the gay community; perhaps this has to do with the smaller pooler of dating prospects available, tendencies toward more open-mindedness and liberal attitudes, and already being more conditioned and accepting of diversity. But in short…yes, they can work! But these relationship pairings can pose some unique challenges that will require extra diligence and commitment to communication and compromise. And with most relationship dynamics, there are many rewards and difficulties inherent in these dating couplings.

Click on the following link to read the rest:  http://www.datingadvice.com/advice/do-may-to-december-relationships-work

© Dr. Brian Rzepczynski, The Gay Love Coach

www.thegaylovecoach.com

This particular article is not for re-publication in other e-zines, magazines, or websites as DatingAdvice.com owns the rights to this material in partnership. Any questions or consent to do so is required by that organization.

 

Despite our knowledge about HIV/AIDS and other sexually-transmitted infections these days, recent studies (http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2013/05/06/gay-men-partner-survey_n_3223447.html) point to a decrease in condom usage among gay and bisexual men. Why is this happening in spite of our knowledge of safer sex education and of the lethality that can be involved with contracting HIV?

Click on the following link to read the response:  http://www.datingadvice.com/advice/how-to-make-safe-sex-hot

© Dr. Brian Rzepczynski, The Gay Love Coach

www.thegaylovecoach.com

This particular article is not for re-publication in other e-zines, magazines, or websites as DatingAdvice.com owns the rights to this material in partnership. Any questions or consent to do so is required by that organization.

 

A study by the University of Michigan asserts that when gay male couples make and keep sexual agreements, this can be an effective HIV prevention strategy. However, according to the study results, more than half of the couples in the sample acknowledged breaking their agreement. Here is an article about the study:  http://www.datingadvice.com/studies/saagcm

What are your thoughts about this?

Dear Dr. Brian:

Not too long ago I met a guy in a culinary festival. The guy is from the U.S. and was part of a study for a semester program in PR.

The thing is we met the last five days of his exchange program and in the little time we spent together, I felt like we connected really well. I ended up liking him very much to the point where I can’t stop thinking of him.

We have maintained a good communication via phone and occasionally Facebook, but sometimes I feel lost and insecure about hoping for something that there might never be a chance for.

Is it worth giving it a shot?

Click on the following link to read the response:  http://www.datingadvice.com/q-and-a/i-met-a-guy-who-lives-in-another-country-is-it-worth-giving-it-a-shot

© Dr. Brian Rzepczynski, The Gay Love Coach

www.thegaylovecoach.com

This particular article is not for re-publication in other e-zines, magazines, or websites as DatingAdvice.com owns the rights to this material in partnership. Any questions or consent to do so is required by that organization.
The suggestions and feedback offered in this column are but one perspective of multiple approaches to dealing with problems or challenges. Information provided in articles and advice columns should not be used as a substitute for coaching or therapy when these services are needed.None of this information should be your only source when making important life decisions. This information should not be used for diagnosing or treating a particular problem, nor should it take the place of a consultation with a trained professional. It is your responsibility to consult a professional prior to making any life decisions

Here’s Part 2 of my 3-part interview series with Harry Faddis of “The Quest of Life” radio show. This segment (9/16/11) covers secrets for keeping the spark alive in long-term gay relationships

http://web.me.com/harryfaddis/qol/TheQuestOfLife/TheQuestOfLife.html