Dear Coach:

My mom called me today to tell me that my brother had told her and my father that he was gay; she had assumed that I’d known. My brother has not told me yet, but I’ve had my suspicions for quite some time now. I love and support my brother and would stand beside him as an openly gay man. How should I talk to him about something he may be too afraid to tell me? read more >>

While this isn’t a dating or relationship question, I received this letter from a reader and was particularly struck by it and wanted to share this post with the community. Please give it a read and feel free to offer any of your own advice or suggestions to this college student seeking some direction. It’s a tricky one with multiple perspectives!

Dear Coach:

I am an 18 year-old gay guy in college who has been “out” about his sexuality for 
roughly two years. I have multiple problems that stem from one major  problem. I’m not sure if I should be “out” on Campus. I am going to a  school that is of moderate right-wing affiliation that has been endorsed by anti-gay politicians in the community, and as I’ve been doing research, I’ve noticed, they are notoriously slow at  implementing GLBT programs. The problem is, I am majoring in Medicine, so I have high hopes and great challenges ahead.

I’ve been debating that if I “come out” at my school, would that be a plus or a negative to the future of my medical career? On one side of the argument, I know I should focus 100% on my education, regardless of my orientation; on the other hand, I have  supreme leadership qualities, and I quite often do not follow the  mainstream population, and I feel, if I don’t come out, I am leaving  my fellow closeted gay friends in a bind and am enabling homophobia.  All too much, we gay men are afraid to come out and  be who we are, which, in my opinion, makes it harder for the next generation to come out. My mother insists I be closeted in college, as  she feels our state has not quite adapted to the homosexual  understanding.  read more >>