Introduction

One of the most common concerns that come through my service from gay singles is the difficulty they speak of securing dates with quality and compatible men; and sometimes it’s even just landing a date of any kind! Invitations for sex seem more readily accessible and the frustration and disappointment is the predominant emotion experienced by these relationship-minded singles who have good heads on their shoulders and are ready and available for love, but just can’t seem to find others who mirror their desire for substance and depth in their involvements. read more >>

Introduction

When you have an online dating personals ad, much of the initial communication and interaction that you will have with a potential dating prospect is primarily through the written word—mainly via e-mail or online chatting. As our society continues to embrace technology as a preferred mode of communication, the traditional “courtship” process has been forever altered when it comes to getting to know someone for potential dating. The lack of face-to-face contact in the very beginning and early stages of online dating can be advantageous as a relatively safe screening period to determine possible compatibility before moving ahead to the more vulnerable direct in-person contact. This can save a lot of time and energy and aids in boosting confidence about meeting someone new. However, it’s also a very impersonal mode of communication fraught with many missing elements that can make this screening process more challenging. For example, the inability to read body language is a major obstacle, as is the difficulty in being able to gauge whether any actual physical chemistry exists between the two people. read more >>

Introduction

So now you’ve met a new guy who you really like and you both are eager to begin exploring the potential that exists in your new dating relationship. This is commonly called “the honeymoon phase” of a relationship and is definitely an exciting and invigorating time. It’s a time of aliveness where the attraction you have for your new boyfriend prospect bubbles over, causing you to think about him and wanting to be with him every waking second. The separation pangs when you are apart nag at you and distract you from your daily tasks. You ache to be with him and find yourself preoccupied with thoughts and fantasies of what “could be” that fuel your desire even further. read more >>

Moving Beyond Online Chatting

So you’ve more than likely been chatting it up online with a potential dating prospect that you’ve met through your personals ad and perhaps even progressed to talking a bit on the telephone. It is generally best practice to gradually move from email correspondence or online chatting to actually speaking “live” on the telephone before meeting in-person for the first time. This gets the acquaintanceship started at a reasonably good pace and allows you to learn more about each other through written and verbal words before taking the plunge to meet face-to-face, which for most people is the more vulnerable and nerve-wracking scenario. Take time to glean the information you receive about this new man through all your modes of communication you’ve had with each other before deciding whether he meets your compatibility criteria to even proceed with a physical meeting. This will help to save much time and energy in your quest for a good first date material. read more >>

What is your relationship status?

View the voting poll results and dialogue here… read more >>

Welcome to The Dating Fitness Center! You’ve made a very wise decision by enrolling in our dating wellness club because you have now joined an exclusive membership with other relationship-minded singles. Here, you recognize that being single is an opportunity and that before you can really appreciate and thrive in a committed relationship with a life partner, you must first be solid and grounded yourself. This means that you’ve done the necessary work and are continually committed to the process of developing and actualizing yourself into your true potential. The ultimate outcome is that you lead a full life of purpose and passion and view yourself as a healthy and happy single. Through this personal growth process, you are maximizing your chances for attracting and sustaining fulfilling relationships with similar dating partners. Remember that according to “The Law of Attraction”, like attracts like. The more your life and self-esteem are in order, the greater your chances are that you will draw other dating prospects toward you that have also achieved a comparable level of well-being and “fitness.” read more >>

Ta-Dah!

Welcome to the launch of my new blog website! Won’t you join me in the clinking of champagne glasses? Well, actually a Mimosa for me please!

My site was re-designed by the magnificence of Joelle Reeder at Moxie Design Studios and I hope you like the new look and navigation of the site  (By the way, if you’re looking for a web designer, I HIGHLY recommend her and you can check out her portfolio).

The new blog feature is hoped to provide more interactivity and to give you easier access to all the content that is available for your self-help needs pertaining to dating, relationships, and sexuality. In addition to the practical articles you’ve come to know from me, you can also look to the blog for advice column responses, voting poll results and dialogue, references to interesting news stories and links to sites catering to gay love and relationships, and special announcements about upcoming classes and products I’ll be offering.

If you haven’t done so already, please feel free to sign up to be on The Gay Love Coach mailing list (the sign-up box is on the sidebar on the left) where you’ll receive the monthly newsletter “The Man 4 Man Plan: Dating & Relationship Strategies for Today’s Gay Man” that will contain monthly updates of blog postings and other goodies, a chance to receive a free e-course of your choosing, and to claim special subscriber bonus “Class Notes” of seminar material I obtain at professional conferences I attend regarding gay relationships and sexuality. You can also subscribe to the blog by clicking on the RSS feed button.

Another new feature is a GLBT Recommended Readings page where you can browse and purchase books on dating, relationships, and sex that cater specifically to our community (it’s on the Shop page).

I hope you enjoy my website and blog and find it a valuable resource for your dating and relationship needs. And I love feedback! Please feel free to add comments to postings, ask questions, and offer your own special insights. If you have any suggestions for articles, please feel free to shoot those ideas my way and I’ll do my best to incorporate them in some way.

The purpose for this site is to create a hub of support and friendship. With our shared wisdom and input, we all can benefit and learn from each other on how to have fabulous gay relationships, whether single or partnered!

Cheers! Here’s to your success!

All my best,

Brian

The Gay Love Coach

“I work with gay men who are ready to create a roadmap that will lead them to find and build a lasting partnership with Mr. Right.”

When you’re dating someone, it’s very important to always be on alert to determine if you and he are compatible for the potential for a long-term relationship. This screening process should be done before and throughout the pre-commitment phase of the relationship. By gauging your goodness-of-fit early on in your dating relationship, you’ll either be laying the foundation for a bond of trust and intimacy or you’ll be disengaging from further connection before becoming too emotionally invested. It’s critical to discover this information as early on in your dating as possible to avoid becoming overly-attached and developing expectations that would likely lead to disappointment and grief. read more >>

Introduction

We live in a society that places high value and expectation on being in a coupled relationship and singles are often stigmatized for their single-status. Gay men, in particular, are often labeled as being unable to develop and maintain long-lasting intimate relationships, adding yet another layer to this stigma. This can lead to feelings of low self-worth and inferiority, a sense that there’s something wrong with you if you don’t have a boyfriend, an excessive focus and preoccupation with your discontent with being single, and sometimes a compulsive drive to find a relationship just to satisfy that nagging need (which can be a dangerous and sabotaging maneuver if one’s dating practices are conducted out of desperation rather than conscious intention). read more >>

Introduction

Sex is all the craze nowadays! Everybody wants to be having it and they want it to be out of this world with eyes rolling into the back of their heads and throats sore from all the unbridled shrieking of ecstasy. While sexual bliss seems to be glamorized in our society, what if you and your partner are experiencing troubles in the bedroom behind closed doors? This can be quite traumatizing and a blow to one’s self-esteem and sense of masculinity, particularly since we men are socialized to be adept and skilled at sexual prowess and conquest. These stereotypes of men “always being ready” and “virile with lots of stamina” put a lot of pressure on men to sexually perform like gods and threatens their identity as a man should problems arise in that part of their lives; they can feel like a failure or that they don’t “measure up” because so much emphasis is put on perfectionism in this area. read more >>